Orgasms
Silence is Golden
Reading the question about louder being better made me wonder the opposite... is quieter always worse? Personally, the more I'm enjoying it, the quieter I am, because every ounce of my attention is on what I'm feeling. I actually have to remind myself to make noise to reassure the guy that I'm enjoying myself, but the problem is, I then end up not enjoying myself as much because I'm focusing on sounding like I am! With a guy who really likes the feedback, I usually can't come at all, because when I orgasm, I don't even breath.... all I'm doing is cumming lol. I feel bad about it though, and it's actually something I sometimes get really self conscious about. I actually really enjoy being gagged during sex because it totally alleviates the pressure lol. So, guys, should I really be worried that my guy is suffering in the silence?
sex-lies-dating301 days ago
Answer 1 of 5
Like DateDaily, I don't think there is a...
Like DateDaily, I don't think there is a right or wrong - but people do have their preferences. I did a poll on my blog (http://www.sex-lies-dating.com/5347228) about this a while ago and found that 8% of people thought that a lot of noise was a turnoff while 36% thought is was kind of hot. Most people fell somewhere in the middle with "it depends".
The comments were great, though.
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sexplorer332 days ago
Answer 2 of 5
During sex isn't the only time to commun...
During sex isn't the only time to communicate with your partner; you can communicate with your partner before and after too! If you think he needs reassurance about your silence during sex, then reassure him after. If that isn't reassurance enough, then that might point out a problem with trust in your relationship; not necessarily a big problem, but a problem nevertheless. I think that in most cases if you give a guy the explanation of why you're quiet that you gave us above, it won't be a problem.
DateDaily332 days ago
Answer 3 of 5
Some people are quiet, others are loud, ...
Some people are quiet, others are loud, there is no right or wrong. You don't have bust out a soliloquy, but a little moan or a "right there" every now and again works wonders for a man's ego.
Also, your lover won't always know if he's hitting the sweet spot, saying 'don't stop' or something like that will give him the encouragement he needs.
But sacrificing your own enjoyment to reassure your man is not the way to go.
DateDaily.com
steveo7336 days ago
Answer 4 of 5
My first thought after reading your ques...
My first thought after reading your question here was that, yea...I think being that quiet can be worse because like you said, the guy won't know if your really enjoying it. Then I got to thinking more about it and realized that I don't really gauge a woman's enjoyment during sex based on how loud she is. It's more about reading her reactions and the subtle things she does. Personally, I can look at her face and know if she's genuinely enjoying the sex...there's just certain expressions and gestures that will come out.
Problem is...sometimes we're in certain positions that don't afford us the luxury of being able to read facial expressions or the lights are out. On top of that...us guys are trying to enjoy ourselves too, we don't want to have to analyze the women's actions to see if shes enjoying the sex.... it should be obvious (one way or another). The most obvious way to show a guy your enjoying the sex is verbally, but I think other things...in particular certain body language like using a little force, or grasping him tightly can show it too.
sshh336 days ago
Answer 5 of 5
Here is my take Scarlett. If you are ha...
Here is my take Scarlett. If you are having sex with a guy you are comfortable with (meaning been with before, dating, in a relationship, whatever) then discussing certain things about your sex life will only make it better. Most guys associate loud with pleasure. For me if a girl is squirming around, gripping the sheets, and moaning very loud...I assume I'm doing something right and I keep doing it. Since you are the opposite with the loud/moaning aspect, just let him know so he can use it as a guide. He'll then know if he's doing something right (when your quiet) or if he needs to switch it up (when your loud).
Now the other type of sex. The random hookup. I'm a firm believer that if you are having a one night stand then the whole purpose is that you want ass. You are doing it to please yourself and your own desires. Since that's the case, I wouldn't be concerned about pleasing the guy so much. He's going to get off regardless. Let's be honest, he's probably worrying about lasting long enough to not look like a fool. I would just do whatever it takes to enjoy yourself. After all it's called a one night stand cause your not spending another night with this guy again anyways.
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