Sex and Society
"Interrupting" the flow of sex
Okay, so I was reading a comment by oohlookasquirrel saying that some guys don't want to stop in the middle of sex and ask a girl for what she wants, or check in to see what is feeling good and what isn't, and she says this is because it would seem like interrupting the flow of sex. That got me thinking...
There are lots of times when people make excuses for not communicating with their partner by using this excuse "it would interrupt the flow". I've heard teenagers say that they don't want to use condoms because it's not sex to suddenly stop and grab a condom. Really? I've made it sexy as hell with my bf, because there is this one point in foreplay where I will stop and say in a husky voice "I think we need a condom" which is my way of communicating to him, you did you're job, I'm horny, I'm ready, LET'S HAVE SEX!
I have never seen condoms as interrupting the flow. I've never seen communicating to my partner what feels good or not as interrupting the flow. That's like saying that switching positions is interrupting the flow - they interrupt for half a second, but it can lead to better sex, or the guy (if there is one) lasting longer.
I just have to say that there if you are not communicating with your partner, whether it be enforcing condom use, or saying what feels good during sex, it's not because it will interrupt the flow of sex, it's because you're scared to speak up. It's a social thing, where for whatever reason, you don't want to talk about it. Stop justifying it by saying that it would make sex worse to talk about this, or enforce condom use.
Thoughts?
Comments (2)
steveo7140 days ago
I kind've agree that it interupts the flow. Here's something that not all women fully understand. If you could take a trip into the mind of a guy right before we're about to have sex...it's not always full of excitement and joy. There's a lot of pressure on us to perform and make sure our general is standing at full attention...if ya know what I mean. Its not a sure fire thing each time, so we naturally try to do everything we can to make sure there's no problems. From personal experience I can tell you that on numerous occasions I've gone to put on a condom and bam!...limp noodle.
The problem is that a) it takes you out of the heat of the moment and b) it doesn't always just slip right on...sometimes the technical difficulties just ruin it.
theomusiii140 days ago
To share a personal tale, I thought to interrupt with one person to request oral sex (I had offered to administer before) not only did it manage to kill the mood, but it brought all activity grinding to a halt for the evening.
To me, a simple, "nope" would have been fine, I can deal with that, but what seems like an acceptable question while intimacy is heating up shouldn't have stopped everything dead.
As far as putting on a condom, I consider it a step rather than an interruption.
1: Get worked up
2: Put on condom
3: Proceed.
It's like putting the safety on on a gun, before you go out hunting. It's something to remember, but it isn't that complicated, and if you don't do it, there can be serious consequences....
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