Moving Too Fast


How fast is "too fast"?

What would you consider moving too fast?

Meeting each other's families before you go on a date?

Kissing on the first date?

Sex on the first date?

Contemplating a future together when you have known someone only a month?

Telling someone that you love them after only one date?


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sexpertover a year ago

Answer 1 of 2

Haha, I've told someone that I was in lo...

Haha, I've told someone that I was in love with them on the first date. To be fair, we had been talking online for about three months, it was a long distance thing, so it was the first time that we had met in person.

So how fast is too fast? Umm... when you feel something before I do. I'm always the one to rush things, so if you're in love before I am, it's almost like I'm in the twilight zone.

I don't mind sex on the first date, but it's usually not what I do when I want a long term emotional relationship with someone.

I like meeting family early, and I like falling in love fast, and I tend to be a really intense person, so it's hard to move too fast for me.

I think what I react badly to is more unhealthy expectations, or pressure - like, if you want to get married and I'm not ready, that's cool, but if you pressure me into it - not cool. If you say "I love you" and I'm not sure yet, don't take it personal that I don't say it back, don't punish me for it. If you are ready to move in with me, but I want to talk it out for a few more months, give me my space, and don't expect me to move at the same speed as you.

Essentially, let's make decisions together, and if one of us is ready for the next step (whatever that is) faster than the other, be patient and let the other person grow comfortable in their own time.

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Simone de Boudoir

Simone de Boudoirover a year ago

Answer 2 of 2

Assuming I'm coming to your family's pla...

Assuming I'm coming to your family's place for Thanksgiving, some eight hours away, when you haven't even met me yet. And also, it's August.

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