Flirting

Q:

How can I break the touch barrier?

I like this girl and I was wondering how I could break the touch barrier without coming off as creepy or perverted. I was thinking about good morning hugs but I don't know how to bring it up. Any advice? what should I do?

alexandfrodo


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Kyle Miracle

Kyle Miracleover a year ago

Answer 1 of 3

More important than anything, is for YOU...

More important than anything, is for YOU to learn to be comfortable with touching girls in appropriate ways in public. How can you become more comfortable with this? Simply start doing it. I'm not going to tell you it's an easy road filled with nothing but laughter and making out. Sometimes you might embarrass yourself - in which case a simple apology is in order, then MOVE ON; don't dwell on the mistake.

As you do this more and more you will learn what is appropriate and when it's appropriate. Also, you will hopefully learn to read people better and gauge how you touch them based on how you think they might receive it...that's called calibrating. Make sense?


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Albedo

Albedoover a year ago

Answer 2 of 3

I agree that a hug is not the way to bre...

I agree that a hug is not the way to break the touch barrier. to me it seems best if the first touch is brief and clearly on a friendly level. I try to send the message that I am comfortable touching them and then make myself available for them to reciprocate.

An example seems to be in order here. I was on a first date with a woman and we were walking down the street. It was cold, we both had our hands in our pockets. We were having a good conversation and both were laughing. I just bumped her elbow with mine while we were both laughing at something, then took the hand closest to he out of my pocket. She took my hand and things proceeded from there.

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S_Jerusalem

S_Jerusalemover a year ago

Answer 3 of 3

The hug is not the way to break initial ...

The hug is not the way to break initial touch barrier here, it is too easy to totally misinterpret. Mid-arm is usually a good target, around the elbow/forearm.

The closer you move to the neck or when you get to the wrist increases connotation of intimacy.

I always like to offer the arm. Keep your eyes open for a situation to walk with her, and offer your arm like in your daddy or grandaddy's day. It is pretty harmless, an uncommon gesture (which sets you apart immediately), and some women really like those sorts of things. Also, if you are a bit of a crack-up, you can always bail out into a joke if it seems to fall flat.

You can also learn a lot about a person by trying to walk in sync with them.

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